Osaka Cherokee

I was walking down the street today and an old guy walking towards me shot a snot rocket outta his nose onto the sidewalk. Sick bastard! Japanese males never cease to appall me!

Here's a picture of the mirrors they've put up in the subways to deter people from killing themselves. On top is basically says "You are special". So apparently you're supposed to see yourself, realize your special, and not jump in front of a train thus saving zillions of commuters the hassle of the delay you caused. I was wondering though, what if you're not special? Then what? What if you look in that mirror and all you see is a piece of shit loser? Shit, wouldn't that just encourage you to do the deed? I'm not a psychiatrist so I don't know.

Song of the Day: Francoise Hardy- C'est A L'Amour Auquel Je Pense

Just got back from a basketball tournament. Only five members of my team could make it. Luckily it was five members that actually have a drive to win. We all had to play the entire game with no substitutions against a team of ten. We tore those fuckers up the first three quarters then they came back and tied it up in the fourth. I missed the last shot and the shit went into overtime. We ended up losing by three but I consider it a moral victory. We played our asses off. That's the first time I've ever said that about my chump ass team.
For the record I only caused one minor squabble. The guy actually bucked up back to me. Finally a Japanese guy with a backbone. Of course none of his teammates came to his aid. Only my team came up to keep me from thumping him. Of course, I made up with the guy later. I'm like that. Gotta keep the balance between angry Cherokee and kindergarten teacher Cherokee.

I was teaching some kids the words for baby animals yesterday. You know, puppy, kitten, calf, etc. Well I got to kitten. Usually the problem is that they always wanna say "kitty" as in that fucker hello kitty. Which isn't technically wrong I would just like them to learn "kitten" too. Well I showed the card and one kid yells out "TITTY!". I felt like saying, "Ok. Pack it up. We're playing outside for the rest of the day. Cuz you just made my day kid!"

Song of the Day: Modest Mouse- Bury Me With It

The other day two teachers at my school were forced to run laps around the hallways. Apparently this was punishment for some,I'm sure, insignificant infraction doled out by the principal, her husband, or her son. You see they run the kindergarten like Stalin would given the chance. They are an empire upon themselves, or at least they would like to think so.
But to get back to the teachers having to run laps. All I have is two words for that..."FUCK THAT!!" I'll tell you what, if my boss wanted to punish me like that that'd be the last nano second I worked at that job. Well, it would be the last five minutes. Those five minutes would be me unleashing a tirade of language (and possibly fists) on the fucker's face. I would never let myself be disrespected like that. I hope none of you would either. No job is worth that kind of humiliation. That's people's problem these days. They hang on to shitty jobs like its their last bastion of hope. Once again let me reiterate..."FUCK THAT!!" There are always a million other jobs out there. We owe no loyalty except to ourselves. I live by my dad's immortal words, "You can work your ass off for a company your whole life and they'll fire your ass the minute you steal a pen."

Also I would like to add that I am a week into my endeavor to quit biting my nails. Holy shit this is hard. Now I understand the shit smokers go through trying to quit. Once I get through this I'll just have to work on quitting swearing....FUCK THAT!

Song of the day: The Who- Whiskey Man

I ran my first 10K race on Sunday. Did it in 51:11. That's not bad for a rookie. Not bad for a ex-fat fucker that used to get tired walking to the fridge either.

I met some guy that morning who invited me to a party with a bunch of Tanzanians. Shit was pretty intense. I love Africans. I never met any until I came to Japan. That's kinda strange, eh? But every single one I've ever met has been cool as hell.
I had a couple beers in my fridge that I brought to the party. One happened to be a Guiness. I cracked it open and one of the Tanzanians was like, "Daaaamn! Where'd you get that Guiness!" I think he wanted it. That's pretty cool for an African. Of course I didn't give it to him. He wasn't that cool. You gotta be pretty special to pry the only Guiness outta my hand.

I was at the gym one town over and I saw they had a poster up for that city's 10k run thing. So I go up to the counter to sign up for it. The bitch, I mean lady, tells me that I can't participate because I don't live in that town. What a crock of bullshit!! Why? Its Japan. Do you need to know more. I don't even ask anymore. I swear to god this country is so fucking retarded. There is absolutely no reason why somebody from another town can't run in the thing. I asked my friend and she said every town is like that. Only people from in that town are allowed to run 'em. Somebody kill me!

Its not the cutural differences that piss me off about this country. I can deal with the noodle slurping and the 654,876 rules relating to chopstick use but I can't handle all the fucking shit that is fucked up just because somebody didn't sit down and think it out or somebody didn't ask "why?". So much shit in this country would go so much more smoothly if the average Japanese person just asked that one simple word, "why?".




Song of the Day: David Bowie- "All the Madmen"